Home Funny 50 Fascinatingly Dumb Things People On Reddit Have Heard Others Say

50 Fascinatingly Dumb Things People On Reddit Have Heard Others Say

by Lukas Garnelis

There’s most likely not one particular person on the earth who hasn’t felt dumb at one level or one other of their lives. It is solely human to expertise delicate mind farts every so often, regardless of your IQ, tutorial achievements, or career. We’re all extremely prone to blunders, and that is okay!

Nevertheless, there is not any denying that dumb issues are humorous. There is a purpose why Reddit at all times appears to like threads concerning the dumbest factor somebody has mentioned or carried out. Dumbest accidents? Viral. Dumbest issues children have mentioned? Viral. So when somebody on the r/AskReddit subreddit requested “What is the dumbest factor you’ve got ever heard?” in fact there have been over 15okay those who upvoted the thread and 1000’s of others taking part in it. Nevertheless, Bored Panda has handpicked you 50 tales that we loved studying essentially the most. Scroll down beneath to learn all of them and share within the remark part the dumbest factor you will have heard!

Extra information: Reddit


“If i might discover a nation that did not take immigrants in I might transfer there…”


I drive for Uber on the weekends and one time a lady who was in her late 20’s instructed me that I used to be making her uncomfortable. I haven’t mentioned a phrase the entire journey so I requested how I might make the state of affairs higher. She mentioned she didn’t like how i saved “enjoying with the fidget stick in the midst of my automobile.” I drive a guide. She then instructed me that I didn’t want to make use of that as a result of “her automobile didn’t have that” and claimed to be a mechanic


Somebody was satisfied that Queen stole the bass line to “Below Strain” from Vanilla Ice’s “Ice Ice Child”. He wasn’t even saying it as a joke.


I used to be in a university class, and we had been speaking about agriculture. Me being from a farming city I used to be explaining how vital sure features of farming are fascinating, and tremendous vital. This one scholar was not budging, and he or she was refusing no matter I used to be saying. I requested her why she was so towards farming, and he or she mentioned “I feel we should always do away with all of them. We do not want them.” I requested her if she favored to eat, and he or she mentioned we’d be nice. We might simply get meals from the shops. I requested her how she deliberate on getting that meals into the shop. She responded with “Nicely they already make all of the meals within the retailer as it’s proper? Why do we want farms. They’re stealing cash from our native companies.” So in a nutshell. She thought every thing, flowers, fish, rooster, loaf bread, and like every thing. Was made within the shops, and that is why we do not want farms.


After I did tattoos, I had a man come into the store that needed “Mr. 113” on his wrist. Not likely all that out of the unusual. We get it drawn up, my co employee positioned it and he or she begins to do the tattoo. As quickly as she begins, the man screams in ache and jumps up. “What the hell is in that factor?! Is there a needle in there?! That [crap] hurts!” …. what?! This man was in his 30s or 40s. How do you not understand how tattoos are carried out?! He mentioned, “I do not know. Simply thought it was some everlasting ink or one thing.” The man went exterior for nearly an hour to smoke and I assume hype himself up. He received the define carried out at the least, however could not take the ache anymore and did not get it stuffed. Nonetheless cannot imagine he did not know tattoos had been carried out with a needle.


A women in math class didnt perceive fractions. We received right down to this as a result of the instructor was explaining smething else fairly easy that she didnt perceive. So broke it down and found out she didnt get fractions. Nicely, thats slightly odd however with a minute of rationalization she ought to get it.
Nope. Instructor requested “what’s bigger, half of or 1/3?” The woman mentioned Three is greater than 2 so 1/Three is bigger.
Instructor drew two circles on the board, divided one in two and the opposite in three elements. “Which is greater?” Woman gave the identical reply.
Instructor erazed each circles, grabbed two items of paper, ripped one in half, one in thirds. Held up a bit of each “Which one is bigger?” Woman identified the 1/Three piece.
“Neglect that there are extra piece” and he binned the remaining, holding up the preliminary two items once more. “Simply take a look at the scale. Which one is bigger?” Woman identified the smaller one once more.
Defeated, instructor lowered his arms and walked again to his desk. “Please take no offense on this… however are you conversant in the phrases and ideas of “smaller and bigger”?” He requested, as this class turned extra sesamestreety by the second.
The woman mentioned she did. Instructor pointed exterior. “See these bushes? Which is bigger, proper or left?” “Left”, woman mentioned and he or she was proper. The left tree was about 5 metres taller. “Then which piece of paper is bigger?” Holding them up once more. Woman identified the smaller piece and the instructor walked out of the classroom.


I used to work in a grocery retailer and this aged girl mentioned, “Twenty-five cents a pound? I can get them Four kilos for a greenback at Safeway


Had a pal over years in the past and we had been speaking about my plasma TV.

He mentioned that he would by no means purchase a plasma television as a result of he did not wish to have to switch the plasma when it ran out.

I did not right him. I assumed it could be greatest if he did not purchase a plasma television.


Is African a faith


Jogs my memory of somebody who wrote a unfavourable assessment of their Spain journey, saying everybody had been foreigners they usually didn’t communicate English


Me: “What weighs extra; a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?”

Coworker: “Bricks!”

It took me about 15 minutes to clarify the reply to him, which included me drawing it out on paper and utilizing a kitchen scale with totally different objects for examples. I drank a lot that night time.


A lady I used to work with was pissed that her boyfriend “solely purchased me 12 roses! He would not even go all out for a dozen, whatta jerk!”


15 yr previous woman was afraid that she could also be pregnant as a result of she had unprotected intercourse, with one other woman.


After I was getting a brand new aquarium, I put my fish into plastic baggage of water to carry them whereas I arrange the brand new tank.
My Mom panicked and began punching holes within the baggage with a pencil. After I requested her what within the good god she was doing, she got here again with:
“I am placing air holes within the bag so your fish do not suffocate. Come on helljack, use your head!”
Nothing I mentioned might persuade her she wasn’t the hero of this story.


If in case you have intercourse with a pregnant woman you possibly can change the organic dad to you. We went to a prestigious faculty and he wasnt dumb. Everybody checked out him like an fool


My previous housemate thought that Down Syndrome was one thing you possibly can get from vaccines.

She wasn’t anti-vax. She was speaking about vaccines and mentioned “I don’t get why mother and father are afraid to get their children vaccinated. The probabilities of catching Down syndrome are actually low.”


my mum as soon as requested if they’d wind in canada…


Oxygen doesn’t come from bushes, it comes from the air!


“Wait! You’ve been to Indiana? Do they actually communicate English?!”


My co employee truthfully thinks if we maintain throwing our rubbish into the ocean that nature will “maintain it” with no unfavourable penalties.


That politician is already wealthy. He can’t be a thief.


Somebody giving their one month previous toddler a bottle stuffed with juice and water as a result of her mom mentioned to. Additionally denying the skilled nutritionist that instructed her that’s unhealthy for a child. One other child, underneath one yr previous, who’s mother places soda in a bottle as a result of the child likes it. I don’t suppose folks understand how really life threatening it’s to provide their very own kids this stuff. And the truth that they don’t put an oz of analysis into what they offer their children, or take heed to the professionals telling them what their doing is improper, simply makes me so indignant.


Q: Do you want bon jovi?

A: No, I do not eat italian meals.


Aged woman my mother knew refused to ever drink Colombian espresso as a result of she was satisfied that they “secretly put cocaine in it”.

If that was the case, each retailer can be offered out of it as quickly as they received it in.



Freshman English class… we had been studying Lord of the Flies on the identical time the film Alive (a few soccer crew’s airplane crashing within the Andes mountains) got here out. Since each had been about teams being stranded and the politics/society constructing that outcomes, we had been discussing the film in school in the future. When discussing their resorting to cannibalism as they remained stranded on the mountain, this one woman requested, “Why did not they only order Domino’s or one thing and have it delivered?”


That flip indicators are solely elective. For a superb chunk of states, it’s legally required so that you can use your flip indicators 100 ft earlier than turning.

Solely to be instructed later that they received a ticket for not utilizing their flip sign.


Cannot you simply maintain in your interval or cease it?


A lady in fifth grade noticed an Algebra textbook on my instructor’s desk and proceeded to exclaim very loudly: “Is algebra a rustic?”


Not too long ago my relative instructed me he received a bunch of bank cards and maxed them out, he plans on paying them again with subsequent yr tax refund. He then give up his job. Identical relative at all times makes enjoyable of me for having “guide smarts” however not “avenue smarts”, however the older I get the extra I understand with the ability to take a look at my funds, stay inside my means and squirrel some away is a type of “avenue smarts” that lots of people appear to be missing.

Additionally just about any touch upon my native information fb web page. A latest one was a few renovated gasoline station. One particular person commented complaining that they spent all that cash and took away gasoline pumps, another person commented that they really had added a number of, the one purpose the road was longer was as a result of it was new and everybody was going there to see the enhancements. The girl replied again actually nastily saying she had a J-O-B and did not have time to rely gasoline pumps, not like another “lowlifes”, fully oblivious that she seemed like an fool. The article even talked about that they added extra pumps, however once more, she has to work for a residing to pay taxes for the welfare bums, she do not received time for studying that both. A easy “oh crap I will need to have been mistaken” or higher but not commenting in any respect would have sufficed. This example shouldn’t be unusual in any respect.


I had a affected person inform me as soon as that smoking can’t trigger most cancers and it’s all an enormous hoax… as I took him to his chemo appointment for lung most cancers, which was more than likely as a result of he smoked 40 a day. (How can anybody afford to do this?)


Video of a woman yelling at Mexicans telling them to talk American. What the precise [frick] language is that ya hick?


Had a coworker inform me “I don’t need that supervisor place. You’re speculated to get much less duties once you promote, no more”


My youthful cousin (boy) in Bangladesh received bitten a monkey, by some means. My uncle (not the cousin’s Dad) real was apprehensive that might make him pregnant. Some bizarre previous historic people story. He genuinely believed it, I can’t even with that quantity of stupidity.


seventh grade historical past class, 2 children had been arguing if there have been 50 or 51 states. One other classmate cleared it up for them- “52, The 50 and Alaska and Hawaii.”

Identical class, totally different particular person when requested a reputation of a US colony answered Wyoming. So the instructor had a superb snigger concerning the Mayflower getting over the good plains.


I purchased a Venus Fly Lure for my desk at work. One of many ladies who works in HR came visiting to my desk and stared at it for a very long time wanting confused. Ultimately she requested, “the place are its eyes?”


My 34 yr previous sister, “I digest my meals very quick. I at all times [crap] after consuming.”


That some flat Earthers now imagine the world is definitely doughnut formed…


I used to be on a date with a lady and he or she was speaking about how being sensible made issues troublesome for her. She mentioned she felt like a social piranha……..


-Zero equals infinite.

Some child in a discord server was making an attempt to show that the unfavourable of zero was infinite. It was 24 folks making an attempt to inform him that zero was neither optimistic or unfavourable and that also did not fulfill him. His principal items of “proof” was “Everybody mentioned Einstein was a mad man till he proved them improper. Y’all be careful I will change this world”

He was banned 2 days later for being underaged.


Attempting to do an intervention for my pal who was utilizing meth. It was simply me doing the intervention as a result of he had alienated/stole from everybody else who ever cared. Anyway, it began when he was displaying me a video on his telephone of him smoking meth in a automobile with another meth head.
I swear on my life it is a actual dialog that occurred
him: I wasn’t smoking meth!
me: You actually, simply now, confirmed me a video of you smoking meth. You even used the phrases ‘I am smoking meth’ within the video.
him: No however I wasn’t smoking it
me: You held a pipe as much as your mouth, sparked a lighter, and inhaled smoke… it was all on the video you simply now confirmed me
him: It wasn’t smoking as a result of it would not rely should you inhale it via your nostril
What the [frick]


I used to be in Spanish class and my instructor requested “What was taking place in Chile in the course of the 1980s” and this dumbass mentioned “World Struggle II”


I needed to clarify to my final landlady {that a} 7 day lengthy Menstruation was regular and that her therapeutic massage work wouldn’t “treatment me” and make me bleed for less than 2 days. That was a enjoyable dialog.


NASA? Is {that a} planet? Stated by a classmate of mine are ours 17 years previous


On the bus, a scholar yelled: “Why is the moon out in the course of the [Freaking] DAYTIME??!!”
She was 13-15 and in center faculty.


My classmate was studying some article “What sort of particular person are you in line with your stomach button” and requested how mine seemed. I discovered that silly and instructed her (not severely, chill) that I haven’t got a stomach button as a result of I got here from an egg. One other classmate heard us and was considering what sort of egg would I be. She instructed me I might be hedgehog egg. However not like me, she wasn’t kidding. A hedgehog. Egg. After I instructed her hedgehogs are mammals, she did not imagine me, trigger the delivery would harm them. She is 19.


I had a neighbor maintain a bottle of water outstretched and spin himself to show to me that gravity is pretend and the world is flat.


Obama has a “climate machine,” and that is why it is so sizzling exterior. Individual was lifeless severe, and labored in DC for the federal authorities for over 25 years, nearing retirement.


“With simply $500 invested on this starter package you can also begin your individual enterprise and turn out to be financially unbiased.”

Stop your b, Karen.


Islands are land that float on the ocean. The person that mentioned that is now a tenured professor at a non-public college.


I overheard this girl making an attempt to persuade her pal that Lake Michigan is an ocean.

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