Right here’s a guided meditation to assist Trump settle for he’s misplaced the election.
Hiya, President Trump. You’ve misplaced the election. Quickly, you gained’t be president anymore – and that’s okay.
It’s okay to not be president. Most individuals aren’t.
There’s no use being anxious or mad concerning the election anymore since you misplaced, bitch. Hearken to the sounds round you. Hear the individuals partying proper outdoors of the White Home, laughing at your defeat.
Consider a time in your life once you did one thing good for others, one thing that may redeem you a bit within the eyes of the universe. What’s that? You possibly can’t consider something? Nicely, for those who conceded proper now as a substitute of continuous to be a bit of bitch, no less than you’d have that.
Image an unlawful poll in your head. Then think about a fire-breathing dragon proper subsequent to it and perceive that neither of those exist.
Now, see your self behind a podium in entrance of the press, desperately awaiting so that you can concede. It’s time to simply accept that you’ll most likely go pee pee in your pants, cry, and fart all on the identical time. That’s okay. All the pieces goes to be okay, Don-Don.
All proper, Mr. President, it’s now time to open your eyes and settle for the hell you’ve created for your self. Bye bye. Bye bye.
Tamara Yajia, Ben Rosen & Grace Thomas